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Question:

In a fire under what circumstances would you let your son pull the fire alarm in?

If there was a fire and you were with your son who was 13 and he asked could he pull the fire alarm to get help what would you say? Would you go with him to the nearest alarm to make sure he is doing it right? What type of verbal advice would you give him? Would you help him lift his leg to kick the glass or take turns hitting the glass with the hammer? As for pulling the handle would you help him do it or let him do it himself?When reading the directions would you tell your son to read them out loud to you so you know what to do in case you need to help him? Would you be talking to him while he is doing it? What would you say when he is pulling the alarm? What if your son's hand slipped the handle would you tell him to pull it again or say lets do it together honey etc?

Answer:

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I think you should somehow reward his efforts and improvement in math without technically ungrounding him. I am not a big believer in grounding, but apparently it has worked for you. I would also offer more HELP in subjects that my child struggles in, even if that struggle is simply motivation. Read Rick Lavoie's Motivational Breakthrough to see if there are more positive ways you can inspire and motivate your son to get better grades. Don't do away with consequences or punishment, but be sure to include rewards as well. Rewards don't have to be monetary, some kids simply enjoy a night playing board games with the family, or going to a ball game, or reading, or doing a project etc. Just because good grades are expected doesn't mean that they should not be praised and/or rewarded. Sometimes the rewards we enjoy the most are the unexpected ones.
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