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Question:

My granny is afraid of water, she's struggling and I am trying to submerge her and baptise her. HELP?

She was struggling a lot. I kept pushing her back in to TOTALLY submerge her, according to bible standards. She would not let me. She was coughing and all that and fighting me.Now she's sitting by the side breathless. How should I baptise her?

Answer:

Trevor, your diatribe has left a larger carbon footprint than all the CO2 released since the dawn of time. It's a theory not a fact and until there is concrete proof that man has caused any change in climate you will have intelligent people questioning the science. That's the way it works.
Dire predictions of catastrophe from that bottomless pit of disasters du jour, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, are based solely on computer models that amount to poorly crafted mathematical opinions, not experimental proof.There is no proof that man-made carbon dioxide causes additional warming, or that carbon-dioxide reduction would reduce warming. . .
If possible I go round them. If I must go over them I slow down as taking them at speed can be rather uncomfortable.
No more than they can give you proof that fire hydrants cause rape. That was an example a statistics professor gave my class. Correlation is not equal to cause if so, fire hydrants cause rape more fire hydrants.. more rape. See the connection? All they have is a weak correlation, there are other much stronger correlations that are much easier to believe. And those other correlations weren't once at fault for global cooling either.
Well, seeing the facts that: A. 1/2500 of the atmosphere is carbon dioxide B. The world is actually cooling C. Al Gore and the Democrats behind this conveniently make loads of money off this D. Climategate proved that the maps were fake E. 97% of all carbon dioxide emitted into the atmosphere is from nature F. Or you could state that last fact as 3% of all carbon dioxide is emitted from humans G. This is getting pretty long :) No reasonable explanations have been given to prove its existence; but statements like this disproving it can be come up with quite easily even from a 13 year old kid like me. Point:MAN-MADE GLOBAL WARMING IS NOT REAL

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