I can't sleep in a hot houseI may be the only person, but I prefer my room to be 55-50, almost like a freezerWith a pile of blankets and pillows, and a completely dark roomAll of that for me equals the best sleep ever.
My preferred temperature is 60-65 degrees with blanketsI can't stand rooms that go above 73 degrees while sleeping.
i liked it.it could be a tad better, just adding like.more descriptive words and adding more exciting vocabularythe one thing i would do is tie together the beginning and the end.like, you jump around a bitwhy does she not get into the elevator? .why is she even IN an elevator in the first place? if you added a few more senteces as to how that conneced to the you tell, you die part, it would be betterjust my opinion! it sounds lovely though.
It's difficult to get by way ofTo me, it sounds a lot more like a primary bankruptcyThe prologue must be approximately 2 pages lengthyPerhaps it must be a flash again, whatever stunning that makes you wish to learn extraI continually pass judgement on a booklet at the prologue and primary bankruptcy, if they are no longer well ample, I may not learn the leisureI have a tendency to seem up examples of prologues to get the consider of ways good they seize me, have a seem at a couple of and spot the way you consider approximately themI additionally believe that you just must ease the reader into the plot, and supply hidden foreshadowing connection with the long run partiesA ordinary subject matter or motif? If you could have one, use it on the opening.
