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You are very astute and are correct in saying that as a rule a resin filling on a posterior tooth will not last as long as a silver filling. How long they last depends on their size. A small filling will last much longer than a very large filling. And yes, every time a filling is removed and replaced, whether it is a resin or silver filling, some tooth structure is removed and the tooth will be weaker. If it is weakened up to a certain degree it would be better to use a crown, inlay, or onlay, either gold, porcelain, or porcelain fused to gold to restore the tooth.
IF you want to keep your housecleaner, you'll keep your wierdness to yourself, I've cleaned for alot of people and quit cleaning for some that couldn't maintain the 2 hours I was there.