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Question:

The fire alarm wont stop going off!?

okay there is no fire or kitchen fire or smoke anywhere in the house.its been doing this all day.i think the battery might need to be changed?

Answer:

This is the most God damned narcissistic poem I have ever read. Are you trying to write an advertisement for your poon tang or something?
If the battery is low you will usually hear an occasional single beep after detector has been quiet for about ten minutes or so.

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