I've agreed to let someone stay in the upstairs apartment of my house. So far, she's demanded that I let her come and see the apartment any time she wishes, no matter what time it is - day or night and I must put my cats downstairs because she's allergic. She always gives me very short notice that she's coming. I'm just wondering how we'll get along if I can't deal with her now.
If you're strong enough you bulldoze back. If you're not bulldozing material you don't get into a match with them, and that means you may have to stay away from them. It sounds like you should nip this one in the bud and find someone else to stay there (if its the money you want/need). If she's staying free you tell her what day she can move in, tell her you have cats and don't guarantee they won't be around, and tell her if she wants to come to the apartment earlier you want decent notice and the hours she can do that are x to x. If she will be paying rent, you write up an agreement with a move-in date. You ask her how many times she expects to need to show up before she moves in, and if she says a number that is too high you tell her she can show up twice before move-in date, and set up a time and date. You tell her, I can't be having in and out at short notice between now and the time you move in, so let's figure out how many more times you want to show up before you move in and get a reading on when those times will be. Again, the world is full of people who needs apartments. Just lay down the laws to her, and if she doesn't like it she can find somewhere else. You may want to write up a rental (or some kind of tenancy) agreement (even if she's staying free) and include all the terms. Tell her you want to do this because you know the kinds of problems that can arise from this type of arrnagement and are trying to prevent them.
I think you already know the answer to your question, you're just trying to figure out if there's a painless way to pull back from having her in your house. I think you need to bite the bullet and tell her that you've had time to reconsider her stay upstairs, and you just don't feel that the two of you are compatible. Apologize for the inconvenience you are causing her, but tell her firmly and politely that you can no longer have her stay in the upstairs apartment. No matter what she says, just keep repeating that you're sorry you've inconvenienced her, but you just don't think it will work out. Good luck.
So this individual is not paying rent? You're just letting her stay out of the goodness of your heart? And she's behaving like that? If she rents the apartment, where will your cats go? Will the be banished to basement life because of her allergies? How many times does she need to look at the apartment? It's either, you rent it or you don't. I would, in NO UNCERTAIN TERMS, lay out the ground rules - the cats stay, etc. It's your house, ultimately your apartment, and she is the tenant. If she doesn't like your rules, she may want to consider other housing options. If you do decide to rent to this woman, your best bet is to draw up a contract, and make sure it's airtight. Good luck!
Well I think you've had a pretty good indicator and as Dr. Phil says you teach people how to treat you and as Dr. Maya Angelou always says people will tell you exactly who they are believe em. You my dear are letting her run all over you. It's YOUR apt , YOU GET to MAKE the rules. She doesn't like em she can go elsewhere. Tell her I'm available at such and such a time and no other. I have cats and cats like to roam , if you don't like it you should probably rent elsewhere. If she's given you a deposit , give it back and say you've changed your mind.
eeek! if there is anyway to get out of this i would do it!!....if she is this demanding and inconsiderate already, i think she'll be a nightmare tenant....if there is no way out then set some groundrules/boundaries quick!
